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If I’d Had A Video Camera I’d Be Rich

If I’d Had A Video Camera I’d Be Rich

I watch “America’s Funniest Home Videos” occasionally, and I just know I would have won the $100,000 grand prize if I’d had a video camera. Let me set up the scene.

My good friend needed some help breeding some cows he had gathered into a small trap. All we had to do was gather them up and breed them.

The problems started when he brought out the horses. One was so green, you needed 200 yards to get him turned around; the other was pretty well broke, but wasn’t overly athletic. Worse yet, the gate we had to push them through was in the middle of the fence row, and the cows simply could not see the opening.

My friend had chased the cow back and forth in front of the open gate three or four times when she got past him and was heading toward the big pasture at a pretty good rate of speed. My friend decided the best thing to do was to rope her, which in and of itself impressed me as I wasn’t aware he’d ever thrown a rope.

To my amazement, he caught the cow on the first loop. He slowed her down and began heading back toward the gate when his saddle began to slip. In a pretty athletic move, he merely stepped off the horse as the saddle gave way and slipped under the horse’s belly. The horse proceeded to put one foot through the stirrup, and then in a panic started bucking like a seasoned NFR veteran. The saddle was coming undone and slinging leather all around as the horse continued bucking in what can only be described as a total wreck.

The cow by now was at a standstill, so my friend picked up the rope and decides, if nothing else, he would tie her to the truck bumper. Just as he headed toward the truck, the cow caught her wind and decided she was angry about the whole process. She started toward him down the rope and he started running, but the faster he went the more slack he was dragging.

Just before impact, he either slipped or tried to jump out of the way. I can’t say for sure because at this point I was laughing so hard I was crying. She jumped right in the middle of him on her way over him, and off she went into the pasture dragging the rope. His horse, after a couple of laps, came back and stood there shaking, waiting for someone to get that blasted saddle unhooked from him.

From now on, I’m going to start taking a camera along. And the cow? We did eventually get her in and got her bred. Anyone want to wager on whether she stuck or not?

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